4 mls in

Well my appointment on Monday went well.

(Other than the bit where I had to get on the scales.....I am now 106kgs, not a happy girl. It just goes to show that without the band I would go back to morbid obesity in no time....)

He gave me 2mls making my band now at 4mls, so I am happy with that as I did think he may have even gone slower than that. He did however say he didnt want me to loose any weight in the next 6months.........yes you can imagine my reaction to that.....NOT HAPPY!

But he also said he wont let me gain any...so I have to be happy with that, as much as I want to loose know I need to be paitient.

So its back to the gym I go and try to firm up once again all the floppy bits...lol.
Restriction is ok, definately eating less...
Till next time xx

needing fill desperately

Well its been another week of mush and I am finding my appetite is going through the roof, I have the instructions from my dietician that to only have a half cup of food moving to a full cup if really hungry...... and I could eat 5 cups with the way my appetite is. I am seeing her on Monday to see if I am ready for a fill. Gosh I hope so or I am going to eat the house!

I will be interested to see how conservative my Dr is this time though as one of my previous mistakes was wanting my band as tight as it would go. Now we know this was a very BAD thing to do. So as I know there is NO fill in the band I am wondering if he is going to put much in! Others I've spoken to have had 3mls at there first fills and with my original band I had 3.5 in already from the surgery. I know there is nothing in it this time though as that is something I asked in hospital.

So in the meantime my cravings for chocolate and icecream are terrible, feel like its that time of the month all month....lol

But I have decided to go back to the excercise......grrr....for those of you who know amazing Donna (she has lost 100kgs....yes 100kgs) I am going for a walk with her tomorrow...... so I will get back and let you know how I go and if I can keep up! lol!
till then xx

Fluid Stage Over....Whoo Hoo!

Well I am offically over the fluid stage....and what a relief that is. Now the hard part starts though, eating real food (even if it is mashed) quantity is going to be the issue as with no fluid in my band there is no restriction......so chew chew chew - here I come!

I just really want to get this right this time! I think I might stay with the optifast for breakfasts as I still have 2 boxes so may aswell use them...

and after reading bridgets blog I am thinking the food diary might also be a good choice to make...oh well only two weeks to my first fill.....

Lapband Support Group Newcastle

Hi, just wanting to reply to Jo, who left me a lovely message this week and let her know that if she would like to join us for dinner on Thursday 5th June at Valentine Bowling Club, she would be more than welcome, a group of about 15-20 bandsters normally go and its a great place to socialise with people who "know" what your going through. You are more than welcome to bring your family along too if that makes you feel more comfortable. xxTrish

Stage 2 Begins

Well the beginning of stage 2 has arrived and it could not have come soon enough.... I really struggled in those few weeks with my band undone. Struggled with the emotions of wanting to eat everything and the fear of gaining it all back.

So Tuesday was a welcome relief. I went in first thing in the morning which was great as I didnt want to be sitting there all day. As it was I was 3rd on the list to be done and luckily for me no.2 didnt show up so I was done even sooner.

Spent the next 2 days recouperating, while my family went crazy around me.....its nice sometimes to know they cant cope without you, but stressful when you know theres nothing you can do about it either....So Thursday morning I came home and got back into the swing of things - there is no rest for the wicked they say!!! LOL

I am still a little sore and taking things slower but feeling great and so relieved to have that restriction back. Scales this morning bought me back to 103.5 so were heading in the right direction....

Have appointment with Dietician on Monday so will move onto mushys from there.... Ben is cooking Bacon and Eggs at the moment and I could just about go and lick his plate...but no I will be strong.... mmmm do wonder though how they would go in the blender!!! LOL

Well off to the markets... will write again soon when I have something more to tell
xxx

Ready for Stage 2

I have just over a week to go till I go in again and have my surgery. I'm so excited to be going back. Interesting though I cant name the amount of people who have said to me.

"Do you think you would be better just to leave it and enjoy eating again???"

and my answer is "Hell NO!"

In the past 4 weeks I have gained around 6kgs, now if that isnt telling me where I would be now without surgery...what is? I mean I know alot of that is probably fluid as I was so dehydrated but 6 kgs!!! AAAHHHH!

I do often think about where I would be now had I never gone ahead with the surgery, and part of me wonders......maybe dead! Its scary to think where my lack of will power takes me, and even more reason why I want to get the whole banding thing right this time.....

I have to say though, now back on the optifast stage, I feel like its all new again and I find myself going back and reading everyones intial blogs to see where I am going to be at. The hardest thing for me I think will be to slow down. The chew, chew, chew part is the hardest as I've always been more of a gulper!!! LOL!

So back at now 103.5 kgs I am ready to embark on Stage 2...... hopefully my next entry will be after my surgery and at the 99kg mark again! What a rollercoaster! If not, and you are wondering where I am, I'll probably be down at the local shrinks office.....crying!! LOL!

Till then xxx

AAAHHH !!! My appetite is back!!!!

Well I am on here thinking I will do a post as that will take at least 5 mins and so theres another 5 minutes I am not looking for food...... I am going crazy with my cravings - anyone would think I was pregnant - no no no - I can assure you I am NOT!!!

But I do feel as though I could eat a whole bakery.... yes bread is my thing at the moment, I guess 13 months without any and I cant even look at baker's delight without drooling, this morning I was going to stop there and get something for morning tea (have the inlaws coming for lunch) and when I saw the counter I had to run away, I was having overwhelming thoughts about all the tea buns and how many I could eat!!!!

So I decided on some buscuits from Woolies as they are no temptation, rather boring really!
Currently I have gained 3 kgs, now my surgeon assured me that I would gain at least that in fluid but it doesnt make it any easier seeing the numbers on the scales....

I have to see my dietician next week, what am I going to tell her - Gosh I hope she doesnt look up banding blogs - she'll know all about my bread addiction and I'll be in big trouble!!! LOL!

So I am going to have to concentrate on portion control this week and saying NO to bread!
I have got my 1 cup measure out so as I dont eat more than this in one sitting, gosh I miss restriction when you just physically couldnt eat the one cup of food, now I could eat the contents and the cup aswell!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok off to clean bathrooms, I think I'll make a list of things to keep me busy and get Ben to bring home a padlock for the fridge and pantry!